Adjustments - Adjustments to Marriage with Commitment - Ephesians 4:22-32
July 21, 2022, 8:00 AM

22 You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; 23 to be made new in the attitude of your minds; 24 and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. 25 Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body. 26 “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold.

Many people will say their hardest year was the first year of marriage. It is during this time there is both the excitement of romantic love and adjustments to the realities of daily living. Early in marriage one person said it is like two rivers coming together to form one larger and stronger one. Initially there can be quiet turmoil. If a couple call it quits when adjustment is hard, they miss out on love in the deeper level that only comes with such commitment. Some people like the change, the flexibility and challenge of new things, and later discover feelings aren’t the same as commitment.

involves the spiritual, physical, social, and psychological parts of a relationship. The conflict of wills is usually a big one. The number one area of conflict within relationship is finances.

There are other circumstantial adjustments when a couple goes through changes. It might be sickness, job change, or unexpected expenses.

A huge part of adjustment of every relationship is learning how to fight fair. When emotions are hurt it is easy to be on the offensive or defensive. We want to either attack the other, because we feel hurt or we want to crawl into a shell and not communicate. It is an important lesson to learn that disagreements are part of any relationship and they should be looked upon as tools to deepen the relationship. Each brings their own personalities into making a stronger solution.

Bible says not to let the sun go down on your anger (Eph 4:26). I wanted to resolve arguments right away. Judi remained silent and didn’t want to talk about it until she could process things in her mind. When I would force the issue to get it resolved it seemed to make things worse. The unresolved tension became a threat to me. We each came to realize our differences in how we process anger and to communicate in ways that bring positive solutions to problems.

plan is to work it out according to Biblical principles and the commitment is worth it.

Application:  What are you doing to make your marriage better? Look for ways you can share in each other’s interests. Read all of Ephesians 4:22-32

Prayer:  Lord, I continue to pray, be in my marriage and all my relationships so that we function as a “cord of three strands”.

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