“But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.”
Jesus calls Kingdom people to a Spiritual commitment to marriage. A Biblical marriage is a covenant by a man and woman before God and witnesses of their intent to be permanently bonded together as husband and wife as long as they live. The physical union consummates this sacred relationship.
A Christian marriage is different from a secular marriage. A secular marriage involves little more than vows of mutual desire, with a state-approved official validating the union. The state has redefined marriage to include any consenting adults, regardless of gender.
A secular marriage is seeking the will and pleasure of those who want a partnership for many reasons. Often the main goal of marriage is companionship, having financial and emotional security, and a partnership for raising a family.
A Christian marriage isn't seeking our will, but God’s will in all things, aiming to carry out His purposes. When God created Eve for Adam it was for love, companionship, and being a helpmate. It involved working together, birthing and raising children in the relationship of three - men, women, and God. Marriage is instituted by the Lord to carry out His glory and purpose in raising a family.
Secular marriage is preoccupied with reproducing our own human images, ideas, and values. For instance, Joe Jock is blond, tall, handsome, muscular football player who is popular. He marries Betty Bikini a sexy woman who is a marvelous dresser and has make-up in the right places. They think such a marriage will be one electrifying thrill after another. The future looks great.
In time spouses and circumstances change. and they are no longer the people they once married. Disappointment and unfulfillment can lead to thoughts of quitting and starting over with someone new, perpetuating a cycle of romantic dreams that eventually face the same reality.
God wants to work in marriages, developing spiritual character, growing in deeper love. Commitment develops patience, long-suffering, gentleness, and learning love, faith, hope, kindness and self-control. You learn those things in godly relationships.
Jesus teaches that marriage is a divine principle, permanent in the eyes of God. Divorce and remarriage violate God's plan, as marriage is intended to be. It grieves me to hear vows said before witnesses and before God that are later broken. On occasions I'm tempted to have couples say at the ceremony, “I vow to remain faithful to you, until I no longer get my way and don't feel happy anymore; then we will part."
I believe our need today is not for a more enlightened approach to Biblical divorce, but for a stronger presentation of the Biblical principles of marriage. Mutual submission under God is essential for weathering the ups and downs of life.
Application: Vow never to give up on your spouse as much as it depends on you. While you cannot control your partner’s actions, you can honor your commitment with God’s help. If both parties keep their vow there will not be divorce. Worship, pray, and read the Bible together. If you resolve you will not leave, then you reach a point where you seek to live with your spouse with mutual submission and harmony. As both do that it produces tremendous benefits and growth in spiritual maturity.
Prayer: Lord, be the center of our marriage and all other relationships.
